Being happy and contented is not an emotion, it’s a state you chose to be in (24/7 if you want).
You can earn so little yet feel happy and contented.
Another employee could earn so much yet feel unhappy and empty.
The two statements above sound contradictory but are a true reflection of what many people go through. Most people seek happiness from life events and things outside them. This is a type of happiness built on quicksand and it won’t stand the test of time.
I have heard statements like,
“I read the novel, laughed my ass off, and felt happy for the first time.”
or
“Spending time with you makes me happy.”
I believe the statements were a true reflection of what the speakers felt after going through the experiences. However, in the former’s statement, what happens when the speaker isn’t close to the person who makes them happy?
Similarly, what is your state of being when you find no novel or movie to tickle your ribs?
Being happy and contented isn’t so much about who you associate with or what you do but it is mostly about you.
People who seek happiness from other people, events, or material stuff are seldom happy within because they are trying to seek happiness and contentment from temporal stuff.
To shift from depending on outside factors for happiness, seek to be contented with what you have and your current state of life.
I agree you may not be living the life you want or have the dream job you desire, But that is not an excuse not to be happy. If you think this is too hard for you think about my second statement in this article.
That leads me to quotes on contentment and happiness. Is not like these quotes will make you happy and contented at the end of the day. But you’ll learn something about contentment and happiness.
25 Quotes on Happiness and Contentment
Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.
Epicurus
Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.
Lao Tzu
Content makes poor men rich; discontent makes rich men poor.
Benjamin Franklin
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
Bilal Zahoor
True contentment is within
ATGW
It’s almost impossible to be satisfied in your own life if you’re constantly looking at what someone else has.
Rachael Cruze
It’s almost impossible to be satisfied in your own life if you’re constantly looking at what someone else has. – Rachael Cruze
Make peace with your now moment. Live in this very moment and be happy with what you have. Joy enters when we stop complaining about the troubles we have and offering thanks for all the troubles we don’t have. And be aware, you have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.
Angie Karan
Just become totally content and happy from within. Then you will get all that you want.
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
Many peopel lose the small joys in the hope for the being happiness
Pearl Buck
Happiness. Contentment. Inner peace. Have you ever gone looking for something only to realize you had it with you the whole time?
Anonymous
It’s not so much how much we have, but how much we enjoy that makes happiness.
Charles Spurgeon
You can own everything in the world but if you lack contentment, you’ll never be happy.
Anonymous
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln
The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are, and not who people think you are.
Goldie Hawn
The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are, and not who people think you are. – Goldie Hawn
Happiness doesn’t depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.
Dale Carnegie
The art of being happy lies in the power of extracting happiness from common things.
Henry Ward Beecher
To be content doesn’t mean you don’t desire more, it means you’re thankful for what you have and patient for what’s to come.
Tony Gaskins
More Contented and Happy Quotes
Each morning when I open my eyes, I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
Groucho Marx
Just become totally content and happy from within. Then you will get all that you want.
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
I don’t have everything I want but I have everything I need. That’s contentment.
James MacDonald
At some point, you gotta let go, and sit still, and allow contentment to come to you.
Elizabeth Gilbert
Now and then it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.
Anonymous
Contentment is an attitude that says, I will be satisfied with what God has given me.
Anonymous
True Humility is Contentment
Henri Frederic Amiel
You are only a poor person if you are not happy with what you have.
Debasich Mridha
Suppose you are happy and contented, good for you because that is the best disposition to b in. I believe your happiness and contentment is not related to what other people have in relation to them or what they could do for you.
On the contrary, if you’re not happy and content, I hope these quotes on contentment and happiness can change your mindset to help you realize that you don’t need a well-paying job. a certain kind of lifestyle or relations with specific people to be happy.
If you want to be in a consistent aura of happiness, deliberately choose to be happy and you’ll be.
Summary
Happiness and contentment are choices to make not feelings
The great boxerMuhammad Aliwas asked how many sit-ups he does. He answered that he only starts counting when it starts hurting. That was a man who wanted to achieve great things.
Similarly, onceBruce Leeplayed a martial art match. Although he defeated his opponent, he was still sad because he had the mindset to defeat him within 3 seconds, but it took 3 minutes to defeat him. Here was a man who had a strong desire to be successful or achieve great things.
He did lots of practice from that day and introduced a unique martial art technique known as “Jeet Kune Do.” These examples proved that you need an extraordinary effort to achieve great success in any part of life.
What Is Achieving Greatness?
Greatness is the concept of being superior in something. You must have seen a person with extraordinary work in his field. And, you have a dream to be like him.
You might have read his story of struggle and how he became so successful. This is a person with greatness. Isn’t it said that those who dare to fail miserably can achieve greatly?
One thing you need to understand is every great achiever is inspired by a great mentor.
In simple words, greatness is the quality of standing out from others and being an extraordinary person in whatever you do.
Achieving greatness is the process or act of becoming great.
Pre-Greatness Rules
Before going on the track, you must know that you should prepare for the race. There are some rules to be followed, which I call the “pre-greatness rules.”
These rules will help you build good habits and warm you up to greatness. Following are some habits that you must build in yourself.
1. Be Self-Reliant
This is a fundamental habit of successful people; they are self-reliant because they know that relying on others will make them lazy and keep them away from their destination. Without this pre-greatness rule, only some achieve greatness.
2. Be Punctual
Being punctual is the second most important habit that you must have. An average mind but punctual person can leave behind an intelligent but unpunctual person.
3. Keep Your Promises
Successful persons keep the promises that they make either with themselves or with others. You would build authority among your community by adopting this rule and making it a habit.
4. Understand the Worth ofEach Minute
Research on failed persons concluded that they all have a common habit of wasting time on other activities rather than their target.
You have to release all the irrelevant thoughts from your mind andmake a habit of being focused only on what you want.
5. Time Management Skill
This is the hardest habit to adopt. It will take longer, and you must keep yourself motivated to build this habit. Time is money, and you got to know how to make it count by all means possible.
How to Achieve Greatness: Rules of Greatness that Succesful People Follow
Once you have built all the good habits, you can start following the principles of greatness. The ten principles will make you an outstanding personality in your circle of influence.
There is a belief that some are born great, others achieve greatness. Where do you think you fall? Nevertheless, some ways to achieve greater success will be tied to the following
1. Build Good Habits
We have talked a lot about good habits in pre-greatness steps. This is just a reminder. Make sure you have all the necessary habits to achieve greatness.
2. Have a Road Map
A life without a direction is not much better than an animal’s life.
Having principles and a sense of direction in life is the difference between humans and animals.
If you want to be extraordinary, then first decide what you want to achieve in life and understand this will come at a cost. Great things are achieved by embracing great dangers.
3. Keep Yourself Motivated
You might be out of track without motivation. You must have an unpleasant event in your life that urged you to become an extraordinary person. So, keep yourself reminded of that unpleasant event, and you’ll be on your way to greater achievement.
It will always help you to stay motivated.
4. Treasure Reading Books
After reading the biographies of successful persons, we can conclude that book reading is a compulsory habit to achieve greatness. Here are some books about achieving greatness.
5. Learn to Ignore the Negative Voices
People will undoubtedly laugh at you or taunt you when they get to hear about your plans and ideas achieved in life. What should you do?
Should you start clarifying yourself? Never!
You will do nothing but waste your energy. Rather than explaining yourself, you have to ignore them. Let them taunt you and answer them by achieving greatness in life.
6. Have a Plan
It would be best if you had a plan to achieve your goals in life.
Smart work is proper planning, building a team, and assigning roles according to their expertise.
7. Consider yourself a Leader
Yeah, this is my favorite rule of success! Read the biographies of successful persons and great achievers.
You will notice that when they started the journey of achieving greatness, they considered themselves leaders.
Thinking of yourself as a leader will force you to build extraordinary qualities, and you will automatically be superior to your peers.
You also have to remember that a person without the qualities of a leader cannot be a leader for a long time. Believe you are born to achieve great things.
8. Become a Critical Thinker
Critical thinking and analysis are vital to your success journey. You have to adopt technical habits.
Analyze your progress daily and criticize yourself for a bad performance.
9. Learn How you can Build a Team
This ability is also crucial. You can never achieve greatness alone. A team of skilled persons will help you move ahead, so; you must have the ability to read people to know their level of mentality and skills.
10. Be a Multi-skilled Person
Some crucial skills include leadership, management, communication, negotiation, and so forth. Do you have the requisite skills to make you valuable in the marketplace? Depending on your goals in life, you may need single or multiple skills to get to where you want to be.
Wrap Up
Achieving greatness is easier said than done. Many yearn for it, but few have the discipline and the determination to reach the finish line.
These principles and mind hacks should be enough to get you started in your journey to achieve greatness.
You must always stay motivated, even when things don’t seem to work out for you. You want to start by first building the good habits for achieving greatness and then follow them through with greatness rules. See you at the top.
If you’re like most people, you get stressed out from time to time. Whether it’s work stress or family stress, we all struggle with the same thing: how to maintain a healthy balance between work and our personal lives.
Stress is not just something that happens to you; it’s something you can control. When you’re stressed out, it’s hard to think clearly. Like most people, the more stressed you are, the harder it is to concentrate.
Stress can make you feel anxious, worried, or frustrated. When stress becomes chronic and affects your health and relationships, it can spiral downward into depression and anxiety.
The good news is that there are many ways to help live astress-free life and even cure some of its symptoms without relying on medication or therapy.
Hacks to Living Stress-Free
1. Get fit
A healthy lifestyle means being physically active, eating well, and getting enough sleep. All these activities help you lead a stress-free life by reducing the amount of cortisol (a hormone that increases during stressful situations) in your body.
2. Make time for yourself
You’ll feel better if you spend time doing things that make you happy rather than spending all your time working or cleaning up after others around you. It could mean taking a walk or playing with your pets instead of watching TV all day. Minding about yourself is a simple hack to living stress-free.
3. Eat healthy food and drink plenty of water
You want to eat healthy food and drink water every day to stay adequately hydrated throughout the day; this is especially important for people who don’t get much sleep at night and those who work long hours or exercise regularly, such as runners or gym-goers.
4. Get enough sleep
Another way to maintain a stress-free life is getting enough sleep. Sleep helps your body restore itself, which leads to astress-free life. If you don’t get enough sleep each night, try using an alarm clock that lets you set it so that if you wake up early in the morning (or late at night), it won’t ring until you are up.
5. Avoid overworking and burnout by taking time off to recharge and unplug from work
Delegate if you can and embrace the power of delegating to stay productive and efficient while allowing yourself to grow in a new role or department within your organization or company.
6. Do what is right
If you want to be successful, do what is right instead of what is popular or accessible at the moment because success comes with long-term rewards that will be worth it in the future when everything seems more complicated than it is now.
7. Please don’t compare yourself with others
This involves focusing on how much they have accomplished over their lifetime compared to how far you have come from; where they were at that moment or today compared with where you are at this moment in time today. The key is not just to reach for goals but also for each day to take one step closer to achieving your dreams regardless of what obstacles may show up along the way.
8. Limit screen time
Limit your screen time on TV, computers, tablets, etc., at least two hours before bedtime, and don’t use them to escape the real world during the day (i.e., “Netflix and chill” is not a substitute for exercise).
9. Meditate Daily
Daily meditation for 20 minutes or more will enable you to lead a stress-free life. Meditation is not just about sitting quietly with your eyes closed. It can be anything from being still and observing your breath to doing yoga or tai chi.
10. Limit alcohol consumption
Reduce your drinking to one drink per day for men and two drinks per day for women; drink in moderation so that you don’t abuse alcohol but instead use it as a social lubricant rather than a form of intoxication or escape from reality.
11. Be grateful
Start each day with gratitude for what you have, not what you don’t have! If something good has happened during the day, give thanks before you go to sleep at night. if something terrible has happened during the day, try to remember the good things that came before it so that you can focus on those instead of dwelling on them and what went wrong.
For example, a typical day has morning hours, mid-morning, afternoon, and evenings. If something bad happened in the morning, let it not extend to your mid-morning. The rest of the day can still be good.
12. Believe in yourself
It helps when you’re feeling down or struggling with anxiety or depression because it gives you strength when others would doubt your ability to achieve what they are aiming for too.
13. Eat breakfast every morning
Eating breakfast will help keep your blood sugar level stable throughout the day, which in turn will help you avoid cravings later on in the day that could lead to binging or overeating unhealthy food choices (like junk food or sweets).
14. Set realistic goals
Setting unrealistic goals is a recipe for a stressed life. It’s not helpful to set goals that are too big or too small for what you can accomplish in the time available. Lead a stress-free life by setting realistically attainable goals yet challenging enough to give you a sense of accomplishment when you achieve them.
15. Have fun with your work
Make your work stress-free by inculcating some fun. Don’t take every job or task so seriously that it ceases to be enjoyable, but also don’t let yourself get distracted by unimportant things like surfing the Internet or watching TV while on the job either.
16. Be realistic about your schedule
You need to ensure you have plenty of free time in your plan to relax and focus on other things besides work if necessary (and especially if it is essential).
17. Get outside more often
Get out for walks or bike rides, hikes, or take up gardening or photography. Anything that gets you away from your desk and into nature will do wonders for your mental health.
18. Take a break every hour or so
It might sound counterintuitive, but working non-stop is not suitable for your mental health; regular intervals are essential, so you don’t burn out entirely by the end of the day (or week). If this means taking a caffeinated drink every hour (or two), then that’s what it means.
Ensure it doesn’t become a habit. The best way to live a stress-free life is to avoid it as much as possible, so take frequent breaks throughout the day and give yourself a mental health day once every week or two, even if it’s just an hour or two away from the office.
Don’t overdo these breaks; they’re just meant to give you a chance to relax and recharge before returning to work again.
Conclusion
Stress is an inevitable part of life. Stress can take many forms, including anxiety, depression, anger, or fatigue. Despite the prevalence of stress in your lives, you often do not recognize it as a problem because you cannot see the symptoms.
Stress is a normal part of life. It’s how you cope with the demands of everyday life. However, when stress becomes excessive and chronic, it can have adverse health effects. Stress management is essential to leading a stress-free life and improving mental health.
We’ve all heard of “Fake it ’til you make it,” right? Well, what if you could use that same idea in reverse and increase your self-confidence, self-esteem, and overall success just by building the habit and then living following it every day?
Building confidence and self-esteem is a lifelong process. The things that make you feel good about yourself at the moment are not necessarily the same things that will carry over into your future. When you’re young, it’s easy to think that you’re going to be the best at everything, but that doesn’t always turn out to be the case.
Your accomplishments become more meaningful as you get older, and your failures are easier to swallow.
The first step to building confidence and self-esteem is to know what they are.
Confidence is the belief that you can do something in yourself or your ability to perform a task.
Self-esteem is the belief that you are worthy of respect and love from others.
Positive feedback from others is the best way to build confidence and self-esteem. When someone gives you positive feedback on your achievements, it reinforces your belief and helps you develop a sense of self-worth.
When someone gives you negative feedback, however, this will only serve to undermine your confidence and cause further doubts about yourself. If someone tells you that you’re terrible at something or worthless as an individual, for example, this can devastate your self-esteem.
It can lead to depression and other mental health issues and long-term damage to relationships with friends and family members who may be affected by these comments.
The best way to build self-esteem is to start believing in yourself. It’s not enough to believe in yourself; you must believe in what you do. You have to see yourself as capable and successful because if you don’t see yourself as competent and successful, then nobody else will.
If a student isn’t performing well, it’s not that he doesn’t have the ability or talent; he doesn’t see himself as capable or successful. And even if he did think that way, he wouldn’t know how to make himself feel better about it.
Signs Of Low Self-Esteem
Low self-esteem is the feeling that you are not good enough. Low self-esteem may make you feel inferior to others, less intelligent and unworthy. You may be critical of yourself. You may think that you don’t deserve the good things in life or that other people are better than you. You may have a negative view of yourself and believe that no one would want to be with someone like you.
Some signs of low self-esteem include:
Your self-image is negative: including how others see you, what others say about you and how much you believe it.
You have difficulty concentrating on tasks at hand because of negative thoughts about yourself, such as “I’m stupid” or “I’m not worthy.”
You have difficulty making decisions based on what’s best for yourself because of negative thoughts such as “I’m an idiot.”
You feel like giving up when things get complicated because of negative thoughts about yourself, such as “It’s no use” or “Nothing will ever go right for me.”
What is self-confidence, and why is it important?
Self-confidence is the belief in one’s abilities and abilities to handle situations, even if they are not necessary or possible. It is a belief that you can achieve what you want to accomplish with your efforts and without help from anyone else.
It could be as simple as standing up for yourself when someone is trying to bully you or as complex as being able to accomplish a goal that seems impossible.
People with self-confidence have a very positive attitude towards themselves and their abilities. They believe that they can do things better than other people. They also think that they can succeed at whatever they decide to do. This kind of attitude makes them more likely to try new things, take on challenges and make changes in their lives.
Self-confidence is crucial because it helps us take risks when afraid of failure or rejection. The more confident we feel about our skills, talents and abilities, the less likely we will stop ourselves from trying something new or challenging ourselves further when we already know we can succeed at something difficult.
How can you increase your self-esteem and self-confidence?
Self-esteem and self-confidence are like a shield you. It protects you from being hurt by the people who are around you. It helps you in making decisions and standing up for yourself.
Here are some ways to increase your self-esteem and self-confidence:
Be yourself – Be true to yourself. Don’t try to be someone else because it will only lead to confusion and frustration. You have a unique personality, and you need to embrace it.
See the good in yourself – Look at all the good things about yourself daily and appreciate them. Focus on what you can do rather than what you cannot do or who else’s expectations are higher than yours.
Get support – Get support from friends, family members or other people who care about you and who want what is best for you in life. Get their advice and suggestions on how they think you should act in certain situations or situations where there is a conflict between two people involved in a relationship (for example, if one person wants one thing while another wants something else).
Practice gratitude – Express gratitude whenever possible by saying “thank you” when someone does something nice for you or says something nice about
Stop comparing yourself with others -It is straightforward to compare yourself with others, which can lead to low self-esteem. It would help if you were happy with whatever you have, so stop comparing yourself with others and focus on what you have.
Learn new things about yourself – You don’t have to be like everyone else to feel good about yourself. You can learn about yourself and grow as a person, which will make you happy.
Get out of your comfort zone and try new things – When you feel comfortable, you tend to stop growing and learning new things about yourself and your lives. We can continually improve ourselves and our lives by doing something different or trying something new.
What are the best self-care practices for self-esteem?
Self-esteem is essential to your overall mental health because it affects everything from your self-confidence to how well you perform at school or work. If you have low self-esteem, it can make it difficult for you to feel good about yourself.
The following are some tips on how to boost your self-esteem:
Exercise regularly: Regular exercise will help improve your body shape and help you feel better about yourself. It also helps reduce stress levels and gives you more energy which makes it easier to deal with day-to-day problems or challenges that may arise in life, such as moving house or starting a new job.
Eat a healthy diet: A healthy diet will help improve your appearance and make you feel better. You should include plenty of fruit, vegetables, and protein foods such as meat, fish, and whole grains (loaves of bread etc.).
Practising self-soothing techniques: Self-soothing techniques include taking deep breaths, engaging in calming activities like yoga or meditation, and having a good night’s sleep.
Taking deep breaths is an excellent way to calm down and relieve stress. Deep breathing will also help you feel more relaxed and less anxious throughout the day.
If you find that taking deep breaths helps you calm down, try using a technique called progressive muscle relaxation.
This technique involves tensing each muscle group in your body from head to toe and then relaxing those muscles one at a time until all are relaxed.
Engaging in activities such as yoga or meditation can also be very helpful for boosting one’s self-esteem because these activities help reduce anxiety and stress while also improving concentration skills, focus, and overall mood.
It is important to note that engaging in these activities should not replace sleep because it may lead to insomnia if one performs them too close to bedtime (which could result in less restorative sleep).
Conclusion
To achieve success in any field, you need good self-esteem and confidence. Without these qualities, you will never be able to make your dreams a reality. To build your confidence, you need to know that you are worthy of being successful and having everything you want in life.
There are many ways to build confidence. Confidence is based on your ability to set and achieve your goals and speak publicly accurately. The key to building self-esteem is identifying how you see yourself and how others see you. For example, are you coming across as someone pushy and demanding? Or are you coming across as someone confident and caring?
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Is your life at a crossroads? Maybe you’re wondering whether you should be an entrepreneur or maintain your day job while indulging in entrepreneurship.
It could be in your career, relationship, business or goals at large. The psychological truth is that you can love two people simultaneously but not with the same intensity.
Given a choice, would you prefer that arrangement? We are accustomed to being binary and, therefore, must make decisions between A and B. It’s either this or that.
The Way it is
I advocate doingthings differently in the digital age, especially regarding our careers. I champion freelancing as opposed to the traditional office arrangement.
So what’s the deal? Do we jump into the 5-8 arrangement? Where you work less for more, perhaps.
Here it’s more about the output. It’s more about productivity than sitting in one place for hours on end with output that may not march the hours you spend.
Entrepreneurship Vs. Day Job
For a long time, I have been thinking about jumping ship and taking a side between the 5-8 (entrepreneurship) and the 8-5 (career). I shuffle on both currently. This can’t even be a conversation for those already into entrepreneurship full-time. Their question would be, “What are you waiting for?”
But the bottom line is not everybody wants the same things. However good of a salesperson I might be, I can’t sell my products to everybody because not everybody wants everything. People have different tastes and preferences and only go for what resonates well with them.
What’s your Goal or Motive?
Some people want to build a career and reach its peak. In contrast, some prefer to plunge into entrepreneurship.
Still, some handle both building a career and entrepreneurship together. Neither of these options is better than the other, but we must face some hard facts here.
If your goal is to be rich, you have three options. You either become one through inheritance, real estate or entrepreneurship. The latter is an option anybody could take, work hard and become massively successful.
You want to examine your motive to leave the 8-5 before joining the 5-8 full-time.
The 5-8 Vs the 8-5
However, before making that lifetime decision, you will need to weigh the pros and cons of taking either route and decide whether to do both for now or to pick aside.
Here is the good thing about keeping your day job.
1. Pays the Bills
Life is getting expensive by the day, and jobs that pay well aren’t easy to come by. Having an 8-5 hustle gives you the benefit of managing your daily and monthly needs well.
2. Your Paycheck is Guaranteed
Unlike business, where the input equals the output, a day job is based on a contract that assures you of a monthly payment unless otherwise determined by your employer.
3. You have an Opportunity to Learn
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither will you. You won’t grow in one day because learning never stops. There are damn expensive courses that your organization or company can afford, which on your own you wouldn’t. Such an arrangement allows you to learn and build your skills professionally, which could go a long way in giving you the skills you need in your entrepreneurship pursuits.
4. Your Paycheck Allows you to Borrow a Loan for Business or Investment
If you are just out of college and starting, banking institutions wouldn’t be willing to give you a loan since you have no collateral or a good repayment plan. However, once you get that payslip, you can leverage it to access huge chunks of credit you could use to build and grow a business. Still, you could opt to invest it and reap the rewards later.
5. You Have the Opportunity to Network
Employees can leverage huge brands of their companies or organizations to network and build meaningful and long-term working relationships with other professionals across the divide. A budding entrepreneur may not have this privilege since they still make a name or portfolio for themselves.
Benefits of the 5-8 (Working Online)
We are in a digital age, and it’s not only about freelancing but also the aspect of e-commerce. If you are thinking about doing this full-time, here are the advantages.
1. You are in Control of your Time
Employees sell their time for a salary. Your employer wants you to see you in the office from 8-5 whether you could be doing something meaningful or not.
Let’s say your output is only 3-4 hours of your time. The rest gets wasted. A freelancer has the freedom of time and can use this to their advantage.
2. You can Handle Several Projects/Clients at the Same Time
You call the shots here. So you decide the breadth of your projects or how many clients you want to handle at one given time, depending on your time.
Of course, this won’t be a tall order for you since you could build a team.
3. You Have More Earning Power
An employee’s lucrative idea in a company could earn them a $200 bonus, as their employer would determine.
However, if you are an entrepreneur, a lucrative idea to your venture or business could pay you much more and open more room for growth.
4. A True Sense of Job Security
As long as the hiring and firing decision is in the hands of someone else, you can’t presume to have job security. Even a permanent and pensionable job could end up in headwinds.
However, working as a freelancer on anything online or brick and mortar cushions you against your employer’s decisions that they could make against you.
We can’t downplay the fact that clients could turn you down or forfeit your contracts. But you are in a better position to bounce back than one being fired from their job.
5. You Have Extra Time to make Other Things, you Love
You can work less for more if your 5-8 pick up well. This gives you the privilege of allocating your time to more important projects in your life.
You could be involved in voluntary activities like missions, charity work or spend more time with family.
Some Signs you are on the Right Path.
Do you feel confused lately over what direction you should take?
The good part is that even in that confusion, the universe has an amazing way of giving you pointers to the right path that will ultimately lead you to your destiny.
These signs don’t only apply to your job, career or business but other areas of your life as well. Take a look.
You encounter tale-tell signs along the Way. It could even be a pop-up on your computer, a road sign or a random notice board somewhere.
You have an overwhelming gut feeling.
You get reassurances from people along the Way
Things unfold with little effort
Your core values align with your choices
Fresh opportunities come to you when you least expect them
You fall in love with a place, a person or a thing
You don’t get bothered by people’s opinions or judgments over your life.
Wrap Up
I have chosen not to choose between the two divides until God, and the universe tell me otherwise. I hope you find the best path to your destiny. I will be expounding on the pointers mentioned above later. Whether you are into entrepreneurship, keep your day job or handle both, you are the only person who can best make that decision.
Overcoming your limitations is possible with the right mindset. Under the sun, limitations are inevitable unless you are not moving. The difference between the winners and losers is that winners choose to overcome their limitations while losers reside in fate.
The flesh of this article today is predicated on our human limitations and our ability to overcome them. Come to think of it; our limitations kick off right from the time we are born. You don’t choose where you are born and whether you came from a rich or a dysfunctional family; it’s upon you to handle every limitation as it comes in the journey of life.
An inspiring figure that we can draw some lessons from is the first African-American President, Barack Obama.
A Sneak Peek at His Life
Born in a multi-racial family -He had to deal with social perceptions.
His parents divorced a few years after he was born, and he had to live with a step-father – Lacked parental love at some point.
The power couple suffered a miscarriage in their young marriage – Michelle had to conceive her daughters via in-vitro fertilization.
The young Obama struggled with a smoking habit – Michelle later confessed he quit.
Barack Obama wasn’t raised in a religious household. – He is a devout Christian today
Despite his racial background, he was elected the first black President of the United States.
That being said, not everyone is born or destined to be President. Still, you can decide to overcome your limitations today and be an agent of change in your community or society. Barrack’s life gives us a taste of what it feels like being at the bottom low and rising to the mountain peak.
Do you know your limitations, and have you purposed to overcome them? Whether it’s a limitation in your education, health, or a bad habit, you have the willpower to give yourself a better life.
5 Lessons About Overcoming your Limitationsfrom the Obama’s
1. Obama was Born in Multi-racial Set-up but Overcame Them
Barrack Obama I https://www.brainpickings.org/
Born in a country known to have a history of racism, it is clear that Obama had to fight the social perceptions that come with being born to an African father and a white woman.
Like Obama, you could be facing a family limitation today, regardless of which part of the world you live in. Yours could not necessarily be a case of different races, but maybe you truly know that you could be facing some limitations in a close to a dysfunctional family. Society always has typical stereotypes about such situations.
Take solace in the fact that we don’t choose our parents, but we can choose to overcome our family limitations.
2. Raised with a Step-Father
Young Obama and family I https://www.reuters.com/
The harrowing tales of children in the hands of their step-parents don’t portray anything good from such a family setup. However, your case could be different. This is an encouragement to children living with step-parents; you happened to be raised in such a family or facing the ripple effects of divorce.
Additionally, there is a rapid increase of children being raised by single mothers who may not be comfortable revealing the identity of their children’s fathers to their kids for reasons they know best. That is a limitation you will need to overcome not to hinder your progress in life. Of course, it’s disheartening and disturbing knowing that your father is walking across the face of the earth, yet you don’t know them.
Face life with optimism and refuse to be limited by your family setup. It’s one thing to have a parent and lose them, and it’s another to have them, yet you don’t know about them. On the positive side of things, you could get that lost parental love from a guardian, mentor, or father figure in your life.
3. Struggled with a Bad Habit and Overcame it Eventually
It’s said that Obama had a bad smoking habit. It isn’t clear how long he wallowed in smoking. Bad habits enslave and could make you miserable in the long run, not to mention their long-term effects.
If you are struggling with a bad habit today, you need to know that it’s quittable. The power to do that rests in your mind. I’m not privy to how exactly he went about quitting smoking, but the truth is, he made that deliberate change to be a better version of himself.
Think about what becomes of you in the next decade if you continue encouraging your bad habits. You, too, can make a change for the better.
4. The Power Couple Had to Overcome their Limitations to Child Bearing
Obama and family I https://www.cnbc.com/
The knowledge that you cannot sustain a pregnancy or sire children is devastating. But how exactly do you overcome this? Luckily for the power couple, they could fix their situation.
Someone once said no problem has no solution. And if it has no solution, it can be managed. The inability to raise children does not hinder you from showing your parental love to children or rather enjoying the warmth and love of a family setup.
This has been made possible through the possibilities of adopting children and raising them as your own. I may not have the best answer here, but with faith, hope and optimism, you can choose to live above your current limitation in light of this context.
5. Overcame Racial Barriers to Become President of the Super Power Country
Barack Obama’s inauguration as the 44th President of U.S I https://edition.cnn.com/
I can’t describe this any better than the headlines that captured the euphoric victory of Barack Obama as the 44th President of the United States. Yes, he had developed the muscles for the presidency through his political career as a senator.
But even with that, the office he was running for needed grit, courage, and enormous resources to pull through. In his own words, Barrack says, ‘Yes you Can.’ And if you keep the audacity of hope high, your joy is bound to come in the morning.
I didn’t say you should run for the presidency in your country, even if you aren’t a politician 😁. But there is something you want, maybe in the line of your career, calling, or business, you keep feeling is bigger than you. What is so bigger than you that you feel you don’t even stand a slim chance to get there?
You can achieve it if you believe in yourself and put your mind to it. What you conceive, you achieve. Overcoming your limitations is doable.
You know it’s not easy. It takes effort to wake up each day and decide to do something meaningful. But now you feel like you have hit a wall, and you don’t have the motivation to do anything.
All you want to do is sleep on the couch and watch a comedy or silly videos all day.
Worse yet, the feeling that you are supposed to be productive gnaws at you, leaving you with guilty feelings. You are bombarded with social media posts about success stories from neighbors and friends which doesn’t help solve the situation either.
What even nails you down further is the uncertainty around the global health crisis that has massively affected today’s way we live.
So what do successful entrepreneurs, athletes, and captains of industries do each day to stay motivated? We offer you some practical hacks to get you started. Keep reading!
1. Be Kind to Yourself
We all have our bad days. Being down for a day or two shouldn’t make you be so hard on yourself. It’s not the end of life.
You should be the kindest person to yourself when hurting or struggling with low energy levels. Tell yourself tomorrow will be better than today.
If you are a go-getter, you are likely to see yourself as not a good fit for success, but that shouldn’t be the case. What you want to avoid is judging or putting yourself down.
2. Replenish Yourself
If you have no motivation, you are depleted and what you need is to replenish yourself. Instead of looking at what you haven’t done or what you need to be doing, use the opportunity to refuel.
You will need to work not only on your mind but your spirit and body as well. How are you taking care of your nutrition needs lately? Are you exercising and sleeping well enough?
What books or videos are you interacting with recently? How you feel determines how you do anything.
3. Trust the Process
You have always been told to focus on your goals. No wonder you are always looking at the results, forgetting to enjoy the process.
Of course, the process won’t always be rosy. There will be the typical ups and downs making you sulk some days, but you need to cherish every step of the way.
During the down days, take a break to replenish and capacity-build yourself.
4. Take Inspired Action
Low energy levels with idleness are what I would call the quickest route to inaction and stagnation. Even when you feel there isn’t much you can do, you can choose to take inspired action.
You want to focus on simple tasks that don’t require much energy to accomplish. This helps kill the inaction and the anxiety that arises as a result of your inactivity.
To make this easy for you, break down your goals into simple, actionable tasks and identify the three most important tasks you want to accomplish.
Doing away with the tasks and ticking them off gives you the impression you are making some progress.
5. Practice Positivity
Practicing positivity means doing the things that will put you in a positive attitude toward life. Here are some positivity techniques you could practice to set you off on a good path.
Practicing positivity will help you see the possibilities that lie ahead instead of focusing on what’s not working.
Sometimes escaping from the heat of the moment with a movie or your favorite TV show is what you may need to bring back your motivation.
6. Cut off Negative Influencers
A lack of motivation requires that you give some thought to your inner self. Listening or spending time with negative influencers pulls you down the gutter further.
This is the time to disengage from every voice around you and interact with your thoughts to understand what’s best for you.
Avoid negative people who want to put you down instead of helping you come out of your inertia state.
7. Employ Burn the Boat Technique
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you would rather swim or sink? If that’s so, that was a motivation to spur you to action.
Sometimes, a little trouble around is the antidote to your inactivity. However, no one wishes trouble for anyone; it’s just that life has no guarantees, and you have to face this reality often.
How are you going to sleep on your couch watching a movie, yet you barely afforded dinner last night, and your house rent is in 3 months’ arrears?
Hernán Cortés was a Spanish conquistador and explorer who lived in the 16th century. At one point, he and his men moved onto an island only to find a group of five hundred other men who didn’t want them there.
Hernán ordered his men to burn down their boats. That tells you one thing: Hernán made the island conquest a matter of life and death. It was either they take over the island or die on the battlefield.
Of course, this isn’t a pleasant situation to find yourself in, but it’s for your good. More insights are in the video below.
Motivate yourself into action
8. Choose Purpose over Pleasure
Sometimes the child in you wants to play and pleasure all the time, but that’s not how life works. There has to be some sacrifice that precedes the glory.
And sometimes, the only thing you have left to wake you up from your inertia is your purpose. Purpose transcends every other thing in your life because it’s what you would rather die for than living.
Purpose transcends every other thing in your life because it’s what you would rather die for living.
Murunga Kiniale
If you have been living on autopilot or simply being a copycat, that will not work for long because the true you will get restless.
What you want to do is take a step back and have a lesser focus on your purpose. Start thinking about what value or how better the world will be when you fulfill your purpose.
It’s never about the fame or the status, and sometimes you need to ask the people who have been there already. They will tell you that’s not the answer.
9. Have some Boundaries
Are you the type of guy who says yes to everything? You’re always the guy who wants things to work out for you and everybody around you.
That’s a good disposition but not the best thing for you. You are accustomed to saying yes to this request or that without giving yourself enough time to process your feelings around the things you say yes to.
You’re now in full action mode, but your emotional state is wanting. This is a recipe for potential burnout and a lack of motivation. Sure, this can be a common trend at the workplace sometimes.
A common sign of burnout is finding no joy in the things you used to find pleasure doing them. You need to find time to recuperate by having some boundaries that give you self-time.
Sometimes saying no or a polite decline is the best answer. Guarding your energy and having that feeling of control is what keeps you going.
10. Connect with your Goals
It’s good you want to be a space explorer like Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos, but does that connect with your big why? Part of the reason you lack the motivation to do anything is failing to have a personal connection with what you want to become.
Maybe you want to be a doctor to make your parents and society happy. But have you thought about whether this is something you like?
Do you find meaning in it? If not, you could be setting yourself up for demotivation in the future. Waking up daily to a job you find no sense of fulfillment is not the best way to live life.
Whatever goals you make, seek to ensure they connect with you at a personal level.
11. Do Something that Gives you a Sense of Value
If you have no motivation to do anything, maybe a good starting point would be to attempt doing something that gives you some sense of value.
If drawing or singing is what makes you feel great and a valuable contributor, by all means, do it.
Gradually, you’re moving away from your state of inertia to action. Do your thing to get the motivation to do other things in life.
12. Stop the Pessimism
Have you heard someone say,’ I feel like I’m not going to make it.’ If everybody was to act or respond based on how they feel, I don’t think there would have been much to celebrate in the world.
You are your own greatest cheerleader, and how you speak about yourself matters. You also need to look into the future with optimism instead of seeing things not working in your favor.
We find ourselves immobilized because we refuse to believe in ourselves and have the confidence that we can do something worthwhile with our lives.
I know the point on feelings seem to contradict point 2, but you can’t leave life entirely based on your feelings.
Wrap Up
That’s the magical list we got for you today to spur you to some tangible action. We hope it helps kill your lack of motivation and keep you going to achieve your goals.
If you found the post helpful, please share and tag a friend. I would also be happy to answer your questions in the comments section below.
If you asked me whether life has a manual, I would have answered you with a yes. It’s that just people don’t give heed to guidance sometimes. There’s never a one size fits all kind of experience. One guy tries doing business today; it picks up within months. Another tries the same business and closes it within the first year. But do me a favor, regardless, never give up.
And that’s why you are better off learning from your own failed experiences because it will be foolhardy to repeat the same mistakes twice.
What I mean to drive home is you should be more afraid of comfort zones than taking risks. How would you love your script to be: Play safe today and die poor tomorrow or take risks today and die rich or trying to be.
The words ” Never give up” have always rung in our ears for the longest time we can remember. But just how do you resist the temptation to give up, pack your bags and leave. We talk about this today, showing you how not to give up and be a 5x better person.
How not to Give Up When you Want to
1. Take a Break
We’ve all been there. Where everything you touch seems to have conspired with the universe not to work when in your hands.
By this time, your confidence is down the toilet, you’re cash-strapped, and the little left of your project seems not to be going anywhere. Motivation gurus have told you to be consistent.
But the more you push, the more the hurdles. If you feel you are at this point, stop and disengage yourself from whatever you are trying to do. Take a break, however long you want, if at all it will help you feel better and in control again.
Preferably, you shouldn’t take a break to sleep. You could listen to your favorite music, go camping or take a road trip for some days. Jump at your hobby or even attend a seminar or constructive workshop.
2. Note Down What’s Working and What’s Not. Focus on What Works
Companies, small businesses, and organizations often undergo restructuring and change their growth strategies either to cut costs, expand their client base, be more efficient, or both.
It’s something that companies must face time and again, or else they could go out of business. Similarly, you should also take stock periodically of what’s working and what’s not.
Success doesn’t come on autopilot mode. You have to be intentional and strategic, or otherwise, you won’t cut it. If action A doesn’t produce the results you need, how about trying action B.
Still, if nothing seems to change, how about combining both routes. There has to be a way around your current problem in business, relationship, or career.
No going back.
No calling it quits
No, you aren’t going to give up!
3. Focus on the Process, Not the Goal
Many times we are told to have SMART goals. This is a good thing because having goals keeps you on your toes, working hard to meet them. However, come to think of it, we rarely meet our goals 99% of the time.
And that in itself could be discouraging, especially when the % could be way lower. How about focusing on the process and not the goal.
Give yourself room for failure and adjust your goals but more importantly, learn something through the process. Let’s say your goal was to make your business global by the end of 2020. But because of other bottlenecks that were out of your control, you weren’t able to hit your goal.
See, you are learning something through the process, which puts you in a position to make better and more informed decisions next time.
Or your goal could’ve been to walk down the aisle before the year ends, but as things turn out, you realize the man who was to walk you down the aisle is a liar and not the person you thought you knew.
The relationship will end, but that’s not the end of your story. You are learning something through the process.
4. Seek Help when you Need It
Even the smartest or most intelligent people in the world need people or a team to work with them. Bill Gates never built Microsoft alone. Mark Zuckerberg had many other geeks who helped him build Facebook into the behemoth it is today.
Their team insights, ideas, and intelligence helped drive their companies’ visions to greater heights. In life, you will need help from lots of people.
Such people could be your peers, colleagues, a business partner; even your ex-somebody could come around amazingly.
One way not to give up in life or endeavor is to seek help when you really need it. Maybe you just needed one word from a friend for that eureka moment.
5. Keep Doing what you Do Best
During Pilot training on safety rules, one of the main things they are always told to do is keep flying the plane no matter what happens. Imagine a pilot stops flying the plane in midair.
What happens next will be more disastrous. That should tell you something. Always keep doing what you do best. You will suck at some point and even be laughed at, but that is always part of growth.
Fix your eyes on what you can do best and keep moving forward. At the end of it all, you will be far much better than the person who decided to stop and listen to what every ingrate is saying around them.
If praying is what you do best, keep praying no matter the pain. If it’s singing, keep singing, even if you don’t seem to get the traction and likes you expect on social media.
Don’t give up because of what’s happening around you. In his book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill mentions that people give up when success is just around the corner. You don’t want to be that kind of person.
6. Detach Yourself from Negativity
It takes great mental strength to keep looking at the positive side of things when they seem to go the other way. Perhaps Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States, is a good person to mention here.
Referred to as the emancipator of slaves, he rose from humble beginnings and went through a troubled childhood where he lost his mother. It’s always refreshing to read his biography.
Sure, he was the perfect candidate to give up in life and mention all kinds of excuses for his failures, but he didn’t.
If your negativity stems from your past life experiences, make peace with your past and let go as fast as possible. Similarly, if you have a negative circle, drop it because it’s not doing you any good.
A positive outlook on life is key to your success and where you want to go next.
How to Bounce Back and be 5x Better
It has been mentioned before that there are no problems but only a shortage of ideas. With better ideas, life is made easier and manageable.
So, your not giving up and bouncing back will be premised on the following:
1. Taking Responsibility
If looking to be a better version of yourself, you need to own your problems. Blame games aren’t part of the success script. Nothing works until you decide to make them.
Whether it was your uncle you feel made you never marry the man of your dreams, or your business partner who ran down your business, take responsibility for your decision and avoid blaming other people who might have been involved.
You only get better when you take charge of your pain points.
2. Learning from your Bad Experiences
Your experience must have been painful and disastrous. Probably, there might have been poor decisions you made that gave you bad results and made you want to give up in life.
Your experience also served as an eye-opener to the things you shouldn’t have done. On the flip side, this is good for you because it means you won’t repeat your mistakes.
3. Learning to Accept What Happened
If you ask me, this is hard but a vital process to come to terms with. Many choose to live in denial after going through a setback.
But this isn’t sustainable. A good way to go through your pain or low point is to accept everything that happened. That is how you begin to bounce back to becoming a better person.
4. Practicing Emotional Intelligence
When you are at your lowest point, emotions always run high, making you bitter and toxic to the poor innocent chaps around you. That shouldn’t be you.
Learn to manage the damaging flood of emotions that lurk around and keep your head sober because things will get better eventually.
Emotional intelligence is all about managing your emotions and those of the people around you. You will bounce back faster this way. Yes! I hope you haven’t given up yet.
5. Don’t Stop Dreaming
The fact that you wanted to give up before shouldn’t make you stop pursuing your dreams. The difference between where you are today and where you will be tomorrow is time.
Take one step at a time and use the power of your imagination to visualize a great future before you. What you can conceive you can achieve if you commit your time to execution.
Wrap Up
Life is a journey with several chapters. Some chapters will leave you cursing and blaming everybody, while others will make you feel happier and a winner.
How you handle the low moments is what determines how you move forward. The easiest thing to do when at the lowest point is to give up.
Unfortunately, this is never the best option for you. Use the tips above to bounce from any setback that will make you want to give up in life.
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Do you build better relationships with people, or are you the person people keep avoiding?
If you are not building better relationships with people, you are doing a great disservice to yourself because all your blessings, your increase, and abundance will come through people, and to be more precise, a man.
Well, how often do you communicate with the people you have saved on your phonebook? You’ll build great relationships with people when you know how to keep in touch and build great relationships with them.
Unfortunately, sometimes you can spend time and money searching for solutions to your problems somewhere else when you carry those solutions and move around with them.
Why so? Because you stopped valuing the contacts on your phone book and felt you needed new ones. You feel they need you, but you don’t need them. That’s the problem you got, man!
I didn’t say you should not network and build new friendships. But equally, you shouldn’t ignore old friends just because you feel they aren’t significant in your life.
Build Better Relationships with PeopleNo Man is an Island
Show me a self-made man, and I will show you a liar. Even if you were to learn a skill on YouTube on your own, someone had to post that video for you to find it there.
Life has some honest and straightforward truths that we always keep ignoring yet cost us our money, time, and other resources.
Because you were once poor and now have begun making money, you start feeling you should cut off your friends because you feel they don’t measure up to the current you.
You feel they are pulling you down.
You feel you can call people who matter and forget about the ones you feel can’t bring a significant change in your life.
Unfortunately for you, this mentality is never right, as just anybody could be successful.
The success you are looking for is not in heaven. It’s on earth, among the people you keep ignoring. Some of these people look cheap and primitive, but they carry your blessings.
In John the third chapter, twenty-seventh verse, John mentions that no one can receive anything unless given to him from above.
If the Lord releases your blessings, he will release them through a man.
He is a Spirit being. You don’t expect him to come down from heaven and bless you. But he will use his servants and other people as vessels of his blessings to bless you.
Similarly, he can also use you for his noble purpose that you may be a blessing to someone else’s life.
Here is why you need to build better relationships with peoplein 2022
1. All great testimonies are connected to man/People
Was there a time you gave a testimony that wasn’t connected to a man? The far you have come is because of the people who have been around you.
In 2nd Kings chapter 13, we are told that Moabites used to raid the land of Israel. In one raid, they found Israelites trying to bury a man. Out of panic, the Israelites threw the body in Elisha’s graveyard. The man came back to life when the corpse touched Elisha’s bone.
I’m passing across the point that all your blessings will come through a man. If you start counting your blessings, every one of them has been through people. The blessings will come through the solid relationships you have established with them.
Before joining campus, you needed a man to guide you through your course selection. A man was instrumental in enabling you to close the deal on that business you are running today.
If married, it’s apparent that you met your wife through people. The bottom line here is that your blessings came through a man; for more reason, you should build better relationships with people.
2. There is Nothing you are Trying to Achieve that a Man hasn’t Achieved before
Now, the world is said to be 4.5 billion years old. Think about all the people who have lived before you.
If you were to get a chance to meet some of them today, which isn’t possible, of course, everybody would have a story to tell. They would tell you about the dreams they had. Their goals and what they were able to achieve.
Talk about any field, career, vocation, or calling in the world; there is nobody that hasn’t gone before you. That tells you something. To succeed, you need people for the apparent reason that they have gone ahead of you. They have learned from their failures and are wise enough to share with you their experience.
In 1 Kings 19;19-21, Elisha left everything he had and all he was doing to follow Elijah. Of course, he followed Elijah because he wanted to be like him – a prophet. The only way Elisha could become a prophet was to learn from another prophet.
3. There are People you Ignore in your Life, yet they Carry your Blessings.
In 1st Samuel 16, the great prophet in Israel, Samuel had visited the home of a farmer and a herdsman, Jesse. The Lord had sent him to anoint the next king of Israel after King Saul had lost God’s glory because of disobedience.
After vetting all the elder sons Jesse thought were the best fit to be kings in Israel, none was found to qualify.
Little did they know that the youngest son in the home, David, carried the family’s blessings. He was the one who was anointed to be king in Israel after King Saul.
If David had not been a king in Israel, Jesse would have been another man in Jesus Christ’s genealogy. But more fundamentally, him being part of Jesus Christ’s genealogy already put him in the records of Bible history.
To his brothers, David was a sheepherder and a messenger to run errands in the home. But what God saw in him is not what others saw.
There are people you keep ignoring and delude yourself that maybe they amount to nothing in your life. But they could be the very people who will make a mark in your life.
4. Some People will Take you to Greatness because of your Small Assistance in their Lives.
Your greatness could be lying in your remote assistance to someone else. Years back, I walked with two of my peers along a street leading to the main town center. Along the way, we met an older man who was pushing a loaded wheelbarrow.
Seeing us passing by, he requested our assistance. My peers ignored him. Deep down, I wanted to help the older adult but fell under peer pressure.
I regretted not helping the older man. Honour is not much of a hefty price to pay. And it could open other blessings you never imagined you would ever have in your life.
The story goes of a bright young lady in a particular village who had just won a scholarship to undertake her higher education in the United Kingdom. I will call her Rachel.
While at home, Rachel used to run their family shop at the nearest trading center. Almost daily, an old village man used to pass by the shop. His better days seem to have gone by, and he wasn’t much of a pleasant sight to look at.
All Rachel could do was greet him and offer an empathetic smile. But you won’t believe it when I tell you what the greetings of Rachel led to.
Just before she flew abroad, the older man got wind that Rachel was flying to the UK in a few days to come.
The man got in touch with Rachel and asked her for a walk in town. They headed to the nearest bank, where the man withdrew money over $2000/Ksh.200,000 and handed it over to Rachel.
All for what? Greetings? Honour? Her case was not even about offering any assistance. She received her financial blessings by just showing respect and greeting the older man. Even smiling at a stranger is enough to start better relationships with them.
5. A Man will Mentor You.
I wouldn’t have begun my freelance writing journey if I had not met with Walter Akolo, the Freelancer Kenya founder.
Walter runs two popular groups on Facebook. Remarkable Freelance Writers in Africa and Awesome Transcribers in Kenya.
Through these groups, Walter has mentored and keeps mentoring thousands of people in their journey as freelance writers and internet marketers.
You feel you are good at something, but you need a man as a mentor to shape you in your craft. But you will unleash your potential better when you have a mentor to walk you through every step of the way.
God uses older men in the faith to mentor young ministers in the gospel. Timothy had Paul.
In Ruth 3, we see Ruth’s mother-in-law, Naomi guiding her on what to do to win Boaz’s heart. Thanks to Naomi’s motherly advice, Ruth got married to Boaz. The two are part of the genealogy of Jesus Christ. What a wonder!
6. You need to let go of a Man Who Has Become a Burden.
Build better relationships with people because, among them, there is a man there who carries your blessings. On the contrary, men could also become burdensome. In that case, you may have no option but to let them go.
You are not the manager of the universe. There is a limit to how far you can go in helping or standing with someone. And sometimes, a man could become a burden for one reason or another.
Some will take advantage of your generosity. Others will be too much to bear. There are some tasks you can’t involve some people because you know they will be a burden.
Take the example of David and Hushai in 2nd Samuel 15:33-35
The Bottom Line
See it this way. If you are the person who keeps ignoring people intentionally, know that you are ignoring your blessings. However much you have achieved or how far you have income in life, you still need people.
When life misfortunes come knocking, which no one is immune to, you will need the same people you think you don’t need to stand with you.
I have a list of unconventional wisdom nuggets to share with you before we wrap up 2021.
I’m not mean. Whatever I learn, you learn and we move forward together, don’t we?
We are just counting a few hours into the new year. I thought it wise to write this post before we cross over. Isn’t that the next big thing? ama ni pekee yangu nangoja kuvuka mwaka?
People always have their own reasons that make them loathe the month of January. From where I live, it’s the month that the sun is always hotter than ever with a dusty wind blowing you right, left and center.
It makes your lips appear dry and cracked. Ooh, January! 😂🤣
Never mind that you made your deep pockets shallow during the festive season. All on what? Eating and making merry? By the way, Christmas is the only time people meet with their larger families, so it’s worth spending an extra coin, right?
13 Unconventional Wisdom Nuggets
I have lived long enough to know when someone is making me look stupid or would want to take advantage of me.
Some bad events in my life have occurred not once but twice because of my sheer lack of keenness about lessons I should be learning in life.
And so while traveling from one town to the next, I put together this list I call unconventional wisdom nuggets to break down life for what it really is.
Be wise about life and thank me later. On the flip side, play with fire and get burned.
1. Don’t Do Business with Relatives
I have been a keen reader of life enough to know that business with relatives is never the best of arrows to use in your quiver. This is unconventional wisdom you won’t read in books or magazines.
If things go south in the business, you will have yourself to blame. You will be the loser and there is little you can do to seek redress.
Where in the world will you take your uncle or cousin? to the police? C’mon, you know where this ends.
I didn’t say they shouldn’t be your customers. They can buy from you as much as they want but don’t make them your business partners.
The case of Tuskys Supermarket’s downfall in Kenya arose due to siblings’ rivalry and greed. It was a family business. Though not directly related to what I’m trying to say, to some extent it rings a bell.
Relatives will take advantage of your blood relationship to manipulate you, steal from you, or simply tarnish your reputation.
Relatives should remain relatives unless it’s an immediate family-owned business with well-learned people.
2 Lend Money you are willing to Lose
The person who comes to you to borrow money is never the same when you call them to ask for your money back.
Most people when borrowing money are always humble, respectful and honest looking until they get hold of your cash.
While this is not always the case with all the people who borrow money from you, a lot that happens is bad news.
All hell breaks loose when they don’t honor their promise and you have to keep calling them to ask for your money back.
Some will be outright rude or feign sickness that they have never suffered from before.
To keep your piece, lend money you are willing to lose or choose to be called stingy. Haha. Apply some unconventional wisdom in your money dealings.
3. You Can Give Money to Strangers but Lend
People can be sly. And mark me right, I’m not being pessimistic or negative. I have a first-hand experience of some of the things I’m writing about.
I met a lady online doing Network marketing. She befriended me asking me to join her network marketing team but I politely declined.
However, she was very persuasive and kept posting images of Mpesa transactions showing her team members making a kill.
Still, she didn’t woo me in. All I asked her was to train and mentor me to be a good network marketer so I could get the skills and use them for my own gain.
She agreed to my request and said there was nothing for free and so I will have to pay her $15/kes1500 for the training.
We agreed that I shall be paying the amounts in bits. We had known each other for less than 3 months when one Friday, she asked me for kes300 to be returned on Monday.
I send her the money because it’s the money I could easily spend on lunch. That was the last time I heard from her.
Any person you have known for less than a year is a stranger. Unconventional wisdom demands that you don’t commit to them any valuable resources you have.
The trick with them is always to stay closer to you as possible, know your vulnerabilities/weaknesses and pap!
They strike when the iron is hot.
4. People Watch your Actions, not your Words.
A lot many times we are always easy with words. And beware of people who talk too much. Even the Bible warns against too many words for in them sin is not absent.
Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut
Proverbs 10:19 (NLV)
Almost always, people have leeway with words. If you get caught in a compromising situation all you have to do is to use your mouth to absolve yourself from blame. Aren’t lawyers making money with law interpretation and words?
However, we easily forget that people will hear your words but also watch what you do after. Be the person who keeps promises no matter how small.
You want to be the person whose yes will be a yes and no a no. The common Swahili saying goes “Tenda mema nenda zako”
Kenyan politicians have a way with words but a large zero on their report cards. A typical Kenyan politician could easily sing his way to parliament, get there and pass no tangible laws or mismanage CDF funds.
He later comes back to his constituents in the next election with a bag of empty promises and sings his way back to parliament again.
Unconventional wisdom dictates that you be a man of your words by honoring them through the right actions.
5. Bosses are the Most Unliked People 🙄
Sorry for being brutal with the truth here, but people seldom love their bosses. Most people sulk, whine, and loathe their bosses/managers for myriad reasons.
Sometimes the juniors complaining are right but some other times they are wrong as well. Your boss could be the insecure type who isn’t happy to see you outshining them. This is because to them that means you are about to take their position.
According to the 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene, it’s never a wise move to outshine your leader or boss.
However, sometimes people outshine their bosses even when they are not trying to. And that alone is enough reason for tension and friction in the workplace.
On the same knot, some bosses have character issues or are either poor at communication and this really creates a lot of friction with their juniors.
Nevertheless, not all bosses can be branded as bad. Some are really good mentors and can groom you to heights unimaginable.
If you can’t tolerate your boss, find another one or start working for yourself and quit your current job. It’s easier said than done, right?
Unconventional wisdom denotes that working for yourself is the surest way to grow rich.
Where there is a will there is a way
6. Motivational Gospel vs. Doctrinal Gospel. Be Grounded on Absolute Truth
Well, I began by saying I have some unconventional wisdom to share with you as we wrap up 2020. Some of my wording is going to be a little bit radical.
You are free to share your reservations in the comments section below.
I’m a believer and ascribe to the fundamentals of the Christian faith that Jesus was born of a virgin Mary, died, resurrected, ascended high above the heavens and is seated at the right hand of the father.
He is our great advocate and intercessor before the father. As believers, we are in him justified he is us glorified.
However, I have been in the church long enough to hear lots of sermons from different preachers and pastors of the word. I can only come to one conclusion: Much of what is touted as the gospel isn’t doctrinal but more of motivational/prosperity speeches with little grounding on doctrine.
The sad part is that people or rather churchgoers have been so accustomed to the prosperity gospel that when you introduce the gospel about who you can be in Jesus and how you can build a strong relationship with him, you look like a liar.
You become boring to their itching ears.
It’s true that believers are inheritors/partakers of the Abrahamic blessings. You will also agree with me that believers have been asked to seek God’s kingdom and his righteousness and all things shall be added unto them.
But our focus shouldn’t be on the blessings, it should be on God and his kingdom and other things will be added.
Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
Matthew 6:33 (NLV)
Let me Preach 🙂
Unfortunately, believers today practice the above verse and vice versa. They seek things first then God later. By seeking things first, they pray less, attend fellowships less, study God’s word fewer times, and everything less.
And this situation most likely stems from insufficient to zero grounding on doctrine because of wrong teachings of the word or none at all.
For example, do believers give because they are blessed or they will be blessed? Everything Jesus has done for the believer is in the past tense. Any gospel talking about Jesus will do is another gospel.
For the non-believers, Jesus will do, because they are not yet in him but for the believers, he has done it all. But wait, Jesus did it and finished it all even for the non-believers.
He will not come from heaven again and be crucified to save those who don’t believe. All they have to do is believe in the finished work of the cross, repent and seek to grow spiritually.
I will not teach but I would encourage you to start listening to preachers of grace such as Joseph Prince, Abel Damina, and Andrew Wommack.
7. Build True and Genuine Friendships with People
I know of people on my phonebook who will only call because they are in distress or need a favor.
Once they get what they want they vanish only to remember you when they are in trouble again.
Those are not friends. I refer to them as parasites because they only show up to ravage your resources. They are like the devil who only shows up to rob, kill and destroy.
To amount to something in this world, you need people. You can’t keep behaving in a way that makes them second guess you and expect their support.
If employed, never make the mistake of believing all your office colleagues are your friends. When you lose your job, a few will keep in touch or even remember to say Hi.
That’s when you will know who your true friends are. Sorry but true friendship is about to give and take. You have to sacrifice your time, money, skills and energy to keep your friendship blossoming.
8. Guardian Angels in Life are Real. There is One for You
Unconventional wisdom denotes that their people in your life who will always vouch for you even when you suck sometimes.
I’m a freelance writer on the sidelines. While looking for work online, I happened to bump into my guardian angel.
We met in one of the Facebook freelancer groups. We were all looking for freelance writing work. He happened to get one sooner and even asked me to lend him a hand.
He loved my work from the word go. Since then, he has always been referring me to potential clients over and over. Even when I seem to do a poor job sometimes, he still believes in my skills and ability to deliver.
We always share our joys and successes and keep encouraging each other in the freelance journey. I believe everyone has this kind of person in life. Someone who is always rooting and vouching for you.
Methinks this kind of situation arises when you have proven your worth and are reliable in your craft or skill.
9. How Good are your Negotiation Skills? Believe me When I say you Can Negotiate through anything in Life
I recently got married. I’m from the Abaluhya tribe in Western Kenya. According to our customs, a young man intending to get married has to pay a bride price of 13 heads of cattle. And 2 goats to accompany the cattle.
So before a young man cements the marriage relationship with her wife to be, it’s a must he pays dowry. What precedes dowry payment is dowry negotiation.
In my case, I had very good negotiators who gave me a breather during the dowry period. Phew!
The message I’m trying to drive home is that you can negotiate through anything in life. Be it a job interview, a business deal, a contract and you name it.
You may not be the best candidate for the job but the panel may ask you “Why do you think we should give you this job?”
Negotiate!
My Upwork Story
I’m a freelancer on Upwork and at one point my account got suspended indefinitely. UUUUiii. My account was dormant for so long because I kept bidding for jobs in vain.
I had also followed some bad advice from an acquaintance that got me suspended from the platform.
I was suspended from working on the freelancing platform. It was on the 24th of April 2018. One of the darkest days of my life.
Notification of my suspension from Upwork
Well, I was so disappointed, to say the least. I started telling myself I’m not cut out for writing. I took a break and forgot about writing on Upwork for a while.
But something changed in me after getting inspired by Walter Akolo’s weekly emails in my mailbox.
I chose to appeal their decision and Alas! These guys accepted me back. Couldn’t believe it. I was shocked I could be this good in making a case. See the screenshot below.
My appeal case to the Upwork marketplace
Check the date. hahaha, I had given up on Upwork for almost two years. Oooh, man. Giving up is easier done than said.
See their response below
My Upwork Account reactivation
One of the happiest days in my life this year was on the 31st of January this year. My Upwork account was reinstated.
Currently, I have an ongoing contract on the platform.
My current contract on Upwork
You can negotiate through anything in life. You can go to the American embassy in your country and negotiate why they need you in their country. ooh yes!
10. Siblings should Learn Teamwork Early before Adulthood
My dose of unconventional wisdom is still here.
Siblings! please! Learn teamwork when you are still young and leaving in your parent’s house. It becomes difficult to do anything meaningful as a team when you haven’t built this culture during childhood.
With age comes more responsibilities. Once you get a job or start a solid business, as a young adult, you are expected to move out of your parent’s home and start paying house rent and other bills.
Sooner you get married and you gonna start changing diapers. With your own family responsibilities, it’s increasingly hard to merge your resources with your siblings to run a project at your home place.
In most cases this happens, if you had never built the culture of doing things together as siblings.
As adults, one sibling is always trying to win the support of the rest in vain. It’s only through calamities or catastrophic events that you find such siblings pooling their resources together.
It isn’t the perfect scenario if you ask me. Build teamwork early in your family.
11. Borrow Money and Invest
The statement – Poor people save rich people, invest sounds like an insult to the efforts of the poor to become rich. But it’s another brutal truth you can’t ignore.
The poor and middle class save most of their hard-earned cash in banks, SACCOs and microfinance institutions. The rich and wealthy or rather those with a wealth mentality go borrow this money and invest.
Ten years down the line, the investors are richer, the savers are not even an eighth of their financial goals.
I would say this, don’t just save because of the 50/30/20% rule. Save with a goal for a certain period of time and go invest that money.
It’s better you buy a flock of sheep that give birth every 9 months than put your money in a bank that gives you less than 9% interest per annum on your annual savings.
Bonds and shares are other better investment opportunities you could explore.
Also, think of ways you can multiply your income streams to manage your current lifestyle. With more income streams, you will have more to save and invest.
Don’t be afraid of borrowing huge loans via your payslip to invest. That’s what the rich are doing and moving forward.
Economics teaches you to manage scarcity or what is there. So, for how long are you going to manage your salary? Unconventional Wisdom can teach you better.
Kes10,000/= in 1999 could buy a lot more than the same amount of money in 2020. I bet you are wise enough to see that. So why not invest?
12. Learn Early What Works for You so You Can Save Much Time and Energy
In life, there is always a stage of exploration and discovery before one settles down with a cutout path in life.
This reminds me of the common saying that life begins at 40. But sometimes we tend to waste much time with things that aren’t cut out for us.
The world, I believe would be a better place, if people knew well enough their purpose and calling. But what is the situation now? We are being defined by our education system and not who we are deep on the inside.
Someone went to school and studied Computer Science but their passion is not even in Computers but Agriculture. But society will want to pin you down by your degree and not your personal interests and passions.
In the journey of life, their things you try over time and they come to work out really well. On the contrary, some flop terribly.
Watch yourself, and know your strengths, skills, abilities and most importantly your passion so that you can leverage them into your destiny.
13. We have Many Success Stories but Few Tangible Mentors
In the West, when a simple, down-to-earth individual becomes a billionaire, you hear later they published a book or a memoir about their journey.
Of course, not all millionaires or billionaires in the West do become authors. In my country, success stories are all over, but you can count real tangible mentors who can walk with you through the murky waters of success in life.
That tells you something, the individuals behind the success stories are shady. I don’t mean to say all successful people should publish books. I don’t hate the rich and not all wealthy people are shady but you need to look at the top billionaires in Africa and make your case.
But the least they can do is to mentor young people to be the giants they can be. My hat off to the Zimbabwean tech and media billionaire Strive Masiyiwa.
Strive has been using the Facebook platform to mentor young people into entrepreneurship and self-employment.
A challenge for you: Become your own success story and mentor someone else into your path.
Conclusion
I hope you found it intriguing and interesting. There is more I could write but I feel 3000 words about unconventional wisdom are enough for today. I leave to read and be the judge. If you want to join this discussion, feel free to leave a comment below. Wishing you a prosperous 2022.
